Are You Looking for Encouragement in all the Wrong Places?
So 2 of my kids have competitive debates in class on today – this is a huge event that they have been preparing for since the beginning of the school year. I prayed and prepped and planned for their success and then, at the moment of truth they tell me not to come – that I must support them from afar. Who ever heard of children not wanting their biggest fan to be in the room with them, sending positive vibes and confident energy their way?
I told them that once upon a time, their natural instinct was to look towards me for encouragement, before they did anything – “Look, Mommy look! Watch me! Did you see me Mommy?!”
So we turn another corner in this life journey and I am reminded that what I perceive as positive energy is received by them as stressful pressure – pressure to perform flawlessly and without missing a beat.
Isn’t it funny to witness this transition? Equally important is the question I must ask you, dear reader – to whom do you look for encouragement?
Do you put the right people in position to cheer you on, to judge you, to challenge you? What is at stake? Only your confidence, self-esteem, and your rate of personal growth. When you have the right team analyzing your behavior, you are more likely to move forward and perform self-correcting behaviors. But when the wrong people judge you – you know the ones who have false motives and selfish desires to see you fail – you are setting yourself up for frustration and goals that are unlikely to be met.
Make sure you find the right encouragement – a support system that builds you up and helps you to find and strengthen your assets, while minimizing your shortcomings. That is a true friend, coach, cheerleader, and yes, even a mom.
To Your Making the Right Connections,
Coach Kim
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts today. It was such an encouragement to hear that another Mom heard the same words from her child that I heard from mine. I guess this is just another part of the journey as you so eloquently stated . As a mom who has always been at everything, it was hard not to share in this special day, so thanks for reminding me that this is a normal process of growing and that sometimes the greatest show of support may be our absence.
I liked that blog entry. My mom has expressed to me in the pass the same thing. When I was around your children’s age, I would get embarrassed at times to have mom around too. I felt to an extent that having her around made me seem like a baby and less independent. BUT… that is not the issue now!!! As I’ve grown I have learn to fully appreciate my mom. I would give anything to have her at every event. I want to tell her every problem and get her council. I think that with age we come to appreciate our mothers more. Maybe it’s because in a decade or so, I may be on the other side of the rope; encouraging my kids and yearning for their acceptance.